My lover knows I consider myself single and all that entails and supports my decision, but finds it hard. He is coping by being a loving friend, but I miss having a lover.
I think being single and open to idea of other men in my life important for self-esteem and psychological well-being for as long as it feels good and not demeaning or cheap in any way. I just miss having him as a lover, although he is a lovely friend and sometime coleague.
Decisions and difficult conversations ahead. He is currently clebrating his sixtieth birthday with his wife, daughter and grandchild. I do know I'm special - I just have to decide if that's enough...
menhir
Being a mistress who no longer wants to be one in a particular relationship is a hard personal and emotional position to be in.
If you are now wanting a permanent companion in your life, you will have to look elsewhere. It does not sound as if you are looking to be a mistress for another. Your ground rules will have to be very different next time round, both for you and the other person.