As well as Friday, I saw my lover Saturday evening and today. Will see him Wed and Fri as well. One advantage to being under-employed is we get to see each other more. Shame about the poverty....

*title courtesy of my lover
Today I had a lovely day with my lover. Sadly when I got a phonecall from a certain blogfriend it wasn't a good opportunity to answer the phone Ummmm.... because the walk-around phone was out of reach!

...and I should go to bed, but despite little sleep today having done nightshift last night seems to sometimes gove me a 'second wind' the following night so i'm suddenly wide awake.
Hey! I've just done my tax return online!!! I'm so impressed with myself! I somehow owe over £80 for unpaid NI though - I thought I had exemption so haven't been reading stuff properly and I think my exemption ran out...
Right! Bed! I'm seeing my lover tomorrow!

So how was it for you?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/4187183.stm
http://living.scotsman.com/index.cfm?id=108812006
http://www.learnenglish.de/diarypage.htm

Very amused that the most miserable day is now part of "British culture, British Customs and British Traditions in January"

Mine was pleasant enough, thanks. I did a night shift that went well and came home to a cuppa, bath and bed.
My lover brought me a cuppa at 10.30 and fixed my radiator and did my housework while I dozed. I stirred myself to be up for lunch which was taken at the wonderful 1927 cafe in canton (it seems Cardiff City actually played well in '27, hence the name...) We had a magnificent bacon, egg and chips and wandered of to buy paint and stuff for decorating my kitchen. As we're both sad addicts we couldn't resist a passing visit to 'Staples' to admire all that stationery!
Came home, had a cuppa and cuddle and then he was off home but I'm seeing him tomorrow!

And how was your day?

ps I'm probably going to get lots of ads for self-help books on depression aren't I?!

Just a quick thank you to whoever nominated me for Bloscars - Was very kind! I know by my readership that my blog (unlike me )is small, but hopefully lovingly and honestly formed! I'm just chuffed to have been nominated. It seems some people are being rather mean about bloscars and giving Paddy a hard time - churlish b*ds!

I live next-door to woman with four teenage children. They are a normal family and sometimes noisier than others. Despite noticing her car from time-to-time I've heard nothing from next-door for weeks.

My lover and I were in the garden this afternoon having fed the birds and sat around while he was having post-prandial fag. I commented I'd not heard next-door for weeks - not even a whisper. we discussed school and work as possibilities but I said it was always quiet.

I must have tempted fate! Tonight is raucous teenage squeals and mysterious 'young people-type'music. Quite nice to hear some life.

I find it hard sometimes to know whether I'm doing stuff I should be doing or practicing displacement when I should be doing something more important.

The other day I sorted the chaos that is my home equivalent of the intray so at least the tax stuff would be easy to find and today I decided I'd look at tax stuff. I knew I'd be delayed by not having extra pages and requiring figures from ex-business partner but it was a start.

And my bed was well past it's change date and I thought psychologically it was a good thing to do. And there's something about a freshly changed bed and clean laundry...

Not only was my tax stuff together, but so was my P60 from one of my part-time jobs - I was confident other one would be with payslips or tax file - it wasn't... Nothing for it but to go through the chaos that was the limbo of important stuff that's not yet been filed. Which resides with stuff to be kept for nostalgia and is kept company by old diaries. Quick sift didn't turn up P60, so I decided to at least send for extra pages. Discovered I could download and printoff so after getting myself lost in cyber taxworld I eventually found and copied forms and decided I earned something to eat.

Another look at tax stuff I'd got together - No second P60. Second look in tax file and payslips just in case - And Tesco and other adjascent suspension files'just in case'. Nothing for it but a proper trip to limbo which I might as well sort...Well of course I had to glance through the diaries! The breakup by my last-but-one ex as I tried to keep a stiff upper lip; the affection of my more recent ex; starting the new job; the cautious approaches and excitement of getting together with my lover; his desire just to see me when we separated; the soap that is my and everyone's life...

And so I had little piles of semi-sorted paperwork everywhere and I had to check email and feed the birds and have a break and it was great to get a phonecall from my lover and I'd been meaning to download Openoffice onto the laptop for ages and I do need to try and get that DVD to play on laptop for presentation. Perhaps today isn't the day to master the Openoffice equivalent of PowerPoint....

Well I separated documents from nostalgia and filed utility bills, mortgage info, wage slips and the rest and felt quite virtuous. Except there was now no place to hide and still no P60. Still have rest of laundry and washing up to do but I have a sense of priority as well as dislike of housework!

I decided tomorrow is another day, but I'll just have quick glance in other files and there it was - With my Tesco stuff - What a strange place for it to rematerialise itself...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernice_Rubens

Dialogue with Menhir reminded me of a wonderful novel by BR and looking for name led me to an obit - I'd not realised she was dead. I love her stuff.

One of my all-favourite books is 'Spring Sonata' about a baby who chooses not to be born, but keeps a diary and plays the violin inside the womb - Rubens is so good she makes me happy to suspend disbelief. She also describes a family therapy session in the novel so well that my fantasy is that she'd been to the Family Institute on Cathedral road in Cardiff. She does talk about Cathedral Road in another of her novels. I actually have two copies of Spring Sonata so I can lend one without being heart-broken if it doesn't come back!

I love her intimate portrayals of people and relationships and her sprawling sagas such as Mother Russia and Brothers.

She was Cardiff-born of Jewish refugee stock and her pictures of Wales and of Jewish culture ae equally engaging for me. There is a fabulous explanation of how her family came to Wales that is used in one of her novels:

Bernice Rubens was born in Cardiff in 1928. Her father was a Russian Jew who had emigrated to Britain from Latvia at the turn of the century. Finding himself a refugee in Hamburg, he had bought a ticket which he thought would get him to America, but in fact it landed him in Wales.

Another novel that manages to be dark and funny is 'Our Father' - about a non-religious woman who meets God. On the more everyday she writes compellingly about marital violence, mental illness, families and relationships.

I think the Epiphany's lovely too.
Our Priest when I was young wouldn't put the 3 Kings in the Crib because he said they didn't get there at Xmas.
If I was doing a Crib I'd put them a bit outside, on their way.
It's all such a lovely story.
I wanted to see The Nativity Story but think I've probably missed it now.
Bonnie very scathing because I said it was true but it is based on some sort of true events.
And I love the Kings being astrologers. They are very glamorous and exotic and I also love the symbolism of their gifts. As far as I'm concerned pagan stuff and Christianity go together.

I loved the following Epiphany comments from Pompadour! my lover and I both discovered we both set the Kings/Magi/Wise Men away from the crib for same reason as she does! I'm impressed by priest who left them out for the same reason.

Ihave two sets of crib figures. my Mum's 'old' set because she bought herself a newer lot and one I bought on holiday in Kenya.

Mum's old ones are a mix of a chalk baby Jesus and plastic everything else of different quality, age and detail acquired over the years. I love having connection with old. the Kings are probably 'poshest' (for plastic!) figures and the set goes on my TV - How classy is that?! The 'tableau' is at centre with kings offset at edge of TV approaching the crib.

My lovely wooden Kenyan set is quite extensive, and is replete with animals, a star, angels and shepherds. Sadly one angel has lost a peg so he is wingless and one shepherd has lost his staff. They are on the unit in my hallway and have lots of space. The three wise men (and their camel!) are seriously off-centre, just bypassing the telephone!

Strangley in a twisted irony, Jesus' father-substitute appears to be missing from both sets, so the patient carpenter has his own stand-in in both sets - a shepherd - Somehow it seems fitting...

Well! I did get some sleep. I managed to allow loads of time to get there and found parking. Cardiff was full of bits of twig after the stormy weather but all went well. I arrived at the Welsh Assembly offices in good time and there appeared to be no record of my meeting... Luckily, despite busy-ness of reception the young man 'seeing to' me was very helpful - and a phonecall later, pointed out that person I was seeing was now actually based in Merthyr - twenty miles away! I spoke to my contact and decided that rescheduling was most sensible option.

My lover was visiting and was going to look at my leaky radiator in my absence. I arrived home first due to the non-event of my important meeting.

Meanwhile my lovely eucalyptus tree was looking awfully dangerous in the winds, so we ended up taking it down! Sawing down a tree in high winds between the downpours felt totally mad, but it was such a relief not having to worry about it. Some lads had actualy knocked my door to tell me that it looked dangerous so I think they felt very important that we'd taken them so seriously. After that sawing down my bay tree that had begun creaking and tapping my window was nothing!

Without the eucalyptus, my front garden is far more exposed so the Mad Woman of Fairwater might have to be a bit more careful with casual gallivanting out the front improperly dressed!

I'm not tired, but have meeting in morning which could be important or huge disappointment. I want to be at my best, but I'm not tired and not in mood for playing in cyber. Have done all the prep that is sensible and even organised my work email stuff. Don't know what to do with myself....Aaaaaaarrrrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Am currently reading Manning's Fortunes of War and just started second novel and reached a not-so-interesting bit and not in reading mood anyway. I've watched a couple of hours of rubbish but enjoyable TV and don't want to watch any more.
I could catch up with The Archers...

1. I am ... sat here in nightshirt and specs
2. I will ... be doing the nightshift again tomorrow
3. I want ... to get enough work in 2007 not to have to get another part-time job
4. I see ...a couple of naked women and a Welsh-language clock if I look up! One picture by my lover and one by my sister
5. I need ...to put some work into setting up as a consultant/trainer

I tag:
Doris T (still trying to get her out of retirement)
Lasttape
Lazybugg
Timsuzi
Trolly
Apologies if you've already been tagged - I'll just check.
You now have to complete above questions and tag five others - Or prove you are less of a sheep than I am and refuse!

He's still poorly but he rang today! (Just thought - Is it rung or rang?! - rang and has or had rung?)

It was the time he usually rings when he gets a chance, but I wasn't expecting a call, so doubly lovely!

He's still poorly, but having done nothing all day yesterday he was just about up to minor shopping. And chance to talk to me and reassure his wife that he's well enough to be out and about next week helped the motivation.

It's just so nice to hear his voice...

Or:
The gentle Art of Procrastination - I should be Taking Down the Christmas Decorations!

Well I do need to take down the external lights and it wasn't worth dressing...And I don't think anyone saw me...And I did put on a coat...
So is it really odd to go out in the rain in a nightshirt, leather jacket and red cowboy boots to take down the Christmas lights?
Job only patially completed as rain was worse than I realised and I wasn't quite up to using step ladder to get at ties on guttering..

Being a tradiitionalist I'm taking down decs today - Twelfth Night/Epiphany/Kings'Day. As a child the tradition was we'd do it after Mass. I no longer attend as a born-again Pagan-type, but neither do many Catholics as Epiphany is no longer a Holy Day.

Although I'm not a believer I like idea of The Epiphany as a Holy Day. I believe its significance is that The Kings/Magi represented The World and Jesus' message reaching other nations. I think it's a lovely idea and for a so called catholic (in the literal sense) church it does seem a significant feast.

I also like the whole concept of an epiphany as a sort of posh 'Eureka!' moment in literature and I guess in life. I shall now have to think about personal epiphanies....Whoops! my Christmas decs are calling me...

Unlike the Sainted Delia, I love my microwave and find it perfect for making sauces.

If I'm making a traditional gravy I simply tip juices into a jug, add cornflour when cool enough and drop of veg water to mix to smooth paste, top up, stick in microwave and stir every minute or two. I use wide and tall glass Pyrex jug.

Also excellent for white sauce - same principle.

Usually custard also works perfectly. If you do sponge tracle pud in microwave the custard cooks in time it takes for pud to stand. It's my belief that any microwave that's not been used for a homemade sponge pud is an affront to the natural order.

Just remembered - I did have microwave recipe for the most amazing sweet sauce when I firast had a microwave. I must fish out...

A perfect bacon sandwich and cuppa followed by two orange club biscuits while watching CBB and Ugly Betty! In the words of the great Meatloaf and Steinman combination -

If I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned
Gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned
If gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned
Dancing through the night
Dancing through the night
Dancing through the night with you

of course I'd rather be with my lover, but a bacon sandwich and being a couch potato brings its own pleasures....

It's not all been the 'white stuff' -I've also raided the Quality Street tin!

Well, he's back at Abertawe, but it's all a bit much for him. As I suspected he's quite poorly and has now taken to his bed, leaving a space in mine

I'm back at work with my very part-time part-time job so did my first night shift in over a fortnight. If all had gone to plan I'd have been awoken with a cuppa and my lover joining me for a sleepy snuggle - It was not to be...

I have however, had some compensatory bread and potatoes! I'd prefer my lover's company but we can't always have what we want as so many of us know. I'm anti-dieting, but I do understand the rudiments of nutrition and know that anything white seems to be really bad - so-called empty calories that give us a high follwed by a low.

Well, after the night shift I had an early sortie in Tesco's. As well as bargain Christmas cards and ribbons and bows I bought stuff for lunch with my lover (before I knew he was too poorly to visit - The 'Hope for the best' mentality) and some lovely crusty white bread. My 'supper' was bread and butter and a cuppa - bad but so g-o-o-d

I got up this afternoon and I swear the bread was romancing me and whispering seductively. So mid-afternoon 'breakfast' was bread and cuppa - And then I discovered the left over potatoes fried with onions. And if there's one left-over dish better straight from the fridge than fried potatoes, it's probably fried potatoes with extra salt - Just keep that bl**dy Gillian Wotsit away from me!

I've also been stealing! Quite an event, really. I'm one of those who didn't shoplift as a kid - And even paid my fare when overlooked by the conductor.Today's raid was illegal, but didn't feel dishonest. I am probably owed thousands in pay, back pay, expenses etc by my old organisation and decided some books would be of more use to me than mouldering in the office until they get scrapped. Somehow I can't see the liquidation folk lighting up with joy at the sight of them. And I can't blame a sugar-rush - it was before I started on the white stuff!

My lover is back from family visiting and spent afternoon with me which was lovely. We're supposed to be seeing each other tomorrow as well, but I think he's quite poorly and I'm not sure he'll be up to it.
He got here today on a mixture of determination and adrenalin I suspect. We had lovely relaxed time together, but he did seem feverish - and not merely at sight of me! I know it's not 'proper' flu because that is so incapacitating, but he seems to have something that causes sore throat, feverishness and 'spaciness' - And I don't think it was me or drugs...
I've still got my Christmas lights up - As they went up late I'm not yet bored of them. Made sitting around house together early evening rather pleasant.

I notice my neighbours have once again 'rearranged'my fairy lights along our dividing fence so they're on their side! I think it's quite funny. I've re-rearranged a couple of times, but decided to leave them - it's nearly Twelfth Night.

Been far less apathetic today. I did start with nice lie-in (It is a Bank Holiday!) and actually got dressed to go to the corner shop - I thought I better had as it was cold and I'm not yet senile.

I've had nice day of puzzles and radio, but done some work as well.

I've found materials for training I'm delivering on 18th, put together letter re current project, sent a work email and had lovely time formatting a health ed leaflet. I love formatting and playing with pictures, although I get totally foxed by the way things rearrange themselves apparently randomly sometimes.

I also had a perfect bacon sarnie and did some washing up.

My lover is still practically incommunicado, but I had text and promise of an email to come.

Currently in my usual garb of nightshirt and specs, my christmas lights are twinkling, my home is warm and all is well with the world in my corner of Cardiff.

Well! I was wrong about nature of bombshells for New Year. It's awfully good, though!
Roll on Sunday for you Omnibus Folk!