I'm feeling a cross between pissed off and sad - Not entirely logical, but how it is. I'd planned quiet day of getting ready for family Christmas tomorrow. I'm cooking and being hostess to siblings, Mum and Aunt.

My sister rang about getting our Mum new cooker as hers has broken. I agreed to keep her company in sorting. Meanwhile my sister had also agreed to go to tesco's for bananas and to collect my mum's £10 winnings from scratchcard. I freaked at idea of going to Tesco's as I'd completely done my planning to avoid having to do such a thing. my sister talked about me waiting in car etc, but then decided against it because of my attitude.

We went to Comet's and Curry's and got a Baby Belling type thing which my sister bought. Difficult to get there because of Tesco traffic so I feel justified, but still Scrooge-like. I just feel like I've 'lost' my day. I didn't mind re cooker, but refusing to go to Tesco's just made me feel unreasonable despite justification.

I have sinkful of dishes and not spent day pottering as planned. Also I need to visit a friend to take present for her daughter. It was intended as a treat, but because I know she's having an anxious Christmas it now feels like a task rather than a pleasure. . And to top it all I have less cash than anticipated so will need to go to Cashpoint. Bah! Humbug!

I know I'll be fine - just feeling robbed of day I intended having and missing my lover.

On a positive note, I am looking forward to waking to smell of roast turkey as I shall be cooking overnight and know that I'll give everyone a nice time.

Happy Christmas, Everyone!
Polly
xxx

ps the ads on my preview were:
"Improve your lovelife"
"Overcoming Infidelity"
and
"Where did the love go?"